Always Be Kind: Losing my Religion

Kindness is such a simple concept, which is taught by all religions. In 2017 I was looking for some religious answers, so I went to India to ‘find myself’. I thought perhaps Buddhism would provide more meaningful responses where Christianity had failed to answer. I ended up with more questions than answers at first, here’s how it happened.

Working in the church, you’d think you’d meet honest, helpful and kind people. “Love thy neighbour” and all that. Of course not everyone is the same and many people were nice, but I was often confronted by selfishness and stubbornness when it came to communicating with my church colleagues. By the time I’d been in India for a while, of course I had met a whole host of people. Some of them were lovely, some of them were not. The ones who were not so lovely chipped away at my idea that Buddhism would be the answer to my restless soul. The final hope slipped away whilst I was on a tuktuk near Pushkar in Rajasthan. Pushkar is a sacred place for Hindus, so no meat or eggs are allowed here. Paradise for me as a vegan! Yet on my tuktuk ride to visit Aloo Babba (a holy man famous locally for fasting a lot and eating only potatoes) we passed a giant chicken farm. Long metal sheds just like those found in Norfolk, with feed towers and a dreadful smell. How could a sacred place be so close to an awful factory? Why did anyone living here think that this was ok? Money I suppose, supply and demand. That’s when I realised that hypocrites are everywhere, not just in the church.

I went through an atheist phase, if there is a God, I thought, why is there poverty like I’d seen all over India and Nepal. However, there were a series of other things that led me to where I am now: after a particularly intense yoga class, meditating on a bus, meeting someone special. (You’re going to have to ask me about these occasions in person!)

Now, I kind of think of myself as multireligious. I’m pretty sure there is a God/creative force, I’m pretty sure it doesn’t matter whether you worship Him/it in a church or temple, but I know for certain that it is good and right to be kind. I think there is much to be learnt from spiritual figures of the past, but mostly I try and apply kindness to everything in my life - from picking up litter as a kindness to others who will come that way, to going to volunteer in the Balkans.

I’m not the only one who has come to this conclusion. Have you heard of “The Kindness Guy”? Leon Logothetis made a TV show called “The Kindness Diaries” where he travels the world reliant only on the kindness of others. He shares the homes and meals of people around the world, sometimes surprising their generosity with kind acts in return. The people he meets and the experiences he has are really life-affirming (albeit with a TV camera hanging around). You can watch it on Netflix.

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"
Christianity

“Kindness should become the natural way of life,not the exception.”
Buddhism

 “Kindness is a pearl of the heart; without it, the heart is just an empty shell.”
Islam

"Practice truth, contentment and kindness; this is the most excellent way of life.”
Sikhism

Kindness includes small, everyday things, doing the washing up or buying someone a coffee, without being motivated by an expectation of repayment. Or big things like taking responsibility for someone who needs help. It also includes kindness to oneself, you cannot pour from an empty cup. I forget and relearn these things all the time, I neglect my own well-being and I am sometimes shy and lazy and don’t follow through with things I say I will do. But I remember again and try harder. Kindness and openness have led to many different and extraordinary experiences which I could never have imagined, let alone planned. Situations and encounters which are not just unique to lucky or brave people, but to anyone who wants to be kind and open towards others. I know I can always do more and I will keep trying my hardest to be kind.

If you want a way of being kind, you can make a donation to help refugees here.

Have you had an occasion where being kind has led to something amazing? Comment below!